Q: What did Noah say as he was loading the Ark?
A: Now I herd everything.
A local pastor was invited to play golf with two friends. Although he said his game was terrible, he went along anyway.
At the first tee, another golfer joined them to make a foursome. So as not to make the stranger nervous, the pastor insisted they introduce him as "Ron." On the fourth hole, the other golfer turned to Ron and asked him what he did for a living.
Confronted, Ron admitted that he was a Baptist pastor.
"I knew it!" the stranger exclaimed. "The way you play golf and don't swear, you had to be a preacher!"